Walter (Anthony Crane), a little man with big dreams, gets more than he bargained for when he is thrown into a world of lust and deception well beyond his imagination. Having always fashioned himself as a hard-boiled detective, Walter encounters Belinda (Ava Vincent), a sultry dame in distress with a body to die for. She weaves an incredulous tale of guns, girls and gangsters. Her story reads like a classic dime store novel with a couple of pages missing. This proves to be a yarn too inconceivable for him to ignore. Join our unlikely hero in this hilarious 40's era detective spoof as he fumbles his way to the truth. By unveiling the mystery and often times sexy lingerie, will he find the real meaning of "safe sex"! After all, Dead Men Don't Wear Rubbers.